16 Signs You're a Vegan Hipster
1. Everything you drink MUST come in a mason jar.
2. You’re ahead on all the vegan trends, thanks to your constant visits to the farmer’s market.
3. You can’t understand how someone would wear nonvegan shoes.
I mean, c’mon—Dr. Martens and Toms have their own vegan shoe lines!
5. Your laptop or *gasp* record player has about 22 animal rights stickers.
6. You’re this person at a restaurant or party:
It didn’t happen unless it’s on Instagram.
7. You know the vegan options from the Mexican food truck better than you know your own name.
Two bean taquitos, hold the cheese, and extra guac, please.
8. All of your cruelty-free products have six or fewer ingredients.
But DIY is always the way to go!
9. You grew your own fur before it was cool.
10. You have four ideas for animal rights tattoos that you plan on getting.
Combine #9 and #10 to attract an unlimited number of vegan hipster girls.
11. When people don’t know what kale is, you think this:
Are you even human?
12. You’re an expert at cruelty-free thrift store shopping.
“I’m gonna pop some tags. Only got $20 in my pocket …”
13. You came out of the womb wearing a beanie.
14. There’s an 80 percent chance your glasses are not real.
Can you please not?
15. Vegan cupcakes are basically a food group to you.
And don’t even get me started on those that come in tiny mason jars. ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?
16. You’re “catholic” … aka a “cat addict.”