How to Impress Vegan Chicks

Posted by  Christopher Merrow

So, there’s this boy. He’s smart, cute, and super-sweet. His one flaw: He’s not vegan.

Meet the boy

And there’s this cute vegan chick. She loves getting caught in the rain, taking dust baths, and going for long walks on the beach.

nugget

They meet.

what a cute chick

foolproof way to

Milk chocolates.

milk chocolates

Milk chocolates? What was he thinking? Cow’s milk is NOT for this chick—it’s for baby cows. ALMOND MILK ONLY, PLEASE! Cow’s milk has pus and blood in it. GROSS!!! Worst gift ever.

GROSS

STRIKE ONE

The cute chick is a little mad, but the boy does not give up! He thinks to himself, “What can I do to cheer this chick up?”

i got it

Two tickets to see the Ringling Bros. circus! Nugget loves animals, so she’ll LOVE seeing elephants, tigers, and lions performing tricks. This has to win her over!

circus tix

He did not just go there!

Nugget shaking head

nugget hates the circus!

Ringling trainers beat elephants and keep them in chains for most of their lives. Animals don’t perform because they want to. They perform because they’re scared not to.

STRIKE TWO

Who said that dating was easy?

tough love

This boy really has to do something to sweep this chick off her feet and make things right.

what can i do

leather jacket

Let’s hope that the boy got her size right. I can’t see anything else going wrong with this!

uppercut

nugget hates leather

When you buy products made from the skins of cows, you’re supporting the horrors of factory farming, including castration, branding, tail-docking, and dehorning, all of which are often performed without the use of painkillers.

STRIKE THREE

tough love

This boy really messed things up, and Nugget refuses to speak to him. What chick would ever want to date a guy who supports cruelty to animals?

Until one day …

They run into each other.

oh hey

GUESS WHAT

HE WENT VEGAN

jumping for joy

All along, the key to this chick’s heart was helping animals. And you can’t start helping animals until you’re vegan. DUH, everyone knows that.

This boy got the chick of his dreams!

Nug Hug

But the happiest part about this ending is that this boy will save the lives of more than 100 animals every year by going vegan. Go vegan and 100+1 chicks will love you.

 

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You Can't Buy Love …

You Can't Buy Love …

… but you can adopt it.

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  • Profile photo of cutiekinnsismycatfriend

    294 days ago

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    0

    Hahaha XD I love this XD

  • Profile photo of llkkdd7

    336 days ago

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    1

    Those gifs though

  • Profile photo of sarahnicoleereal

    342 days ago

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    3

    aww (:

  • Profile photo of banksy

    412 days ago

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    3

    i wish i had a gf

  • Profile photo of TheVeganDancer

    420 days ago

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    1

    this is perfection :)

  • Profile photo of winniethecarrot

    435 days ago

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    2

    Adorable :”)

  • Profile photo of Sagojyou

    440 days ago

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    3

    Ha ha ha, this is adorable XD
    My bf went vegetarian when we started going out. It was his own choice and it made me really happy! And he’s saving animals too! Woo! X)

  • Profile photo of kylekylekyle

    445 days ago

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    5

    I won’t kiss my bf until he goes at least vegetarian, or brushes his teeth first. Sorry, but cruelty-breath is horrible.

  • 446 days ago

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]

    11

    Dude you don’t go vegan to impress “chicks” you do it because it’s healthier for yourself, the animals, and the planet.

    Be a real man and do what’s right because it’s right.

  • Profile photo of veganlove

    457 days ago

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    1

    Hahahahaha yeah my boyfriend wont even go vegetarian:(