Jeph Howard is a busy man. With The Used’s highly anticipated album, Lies for the Liars,  everyone on Taste of Chaos wanted to pick the bassist’s brain, including peta2. Before the tour came to an end last month, the peta2 staffers who had been tabling at every stop tried everything short of tackling Jeph for the chance to chat with him for 10 minutes.

They watched him bounce from interview to interview for weeks and disappear to shoot a video for The Used’s next single, reappearing at arm’s length only to be whisked away again for yet another pressing commitment. Finally, on the very last day of the tour, the peta2 staffers were able to steal some of Jeph’s time and ask him a few of our most pressing questions about things like people who chain their dogs, dissection, going veg, working with John Feldmann—oh, and the new album too. Jeph’s a fun guy, and since you never know just what he’s going to say, we thought we’d go with a theme for his Q&A. So check out “What Would Jeph Say?”

What Would Jeph Say?

What would you say to Colonel Sanders?
If he weren’t dead?

If he weren’t dead.
Can I say a couple things to him?

You can say as much as you want.
’Cause the first KFC was in Utah, I would ask him why he called it “Kentucky fried.” That’s the first thing I would ask him. ’Cause that intrigues me. I know it’s an adjective, “Kentucky,” but it still intrigues me why he would wanna open it in Utah first, and not Kentucky. So you guys probably hate Utah now more than anything. But that’s OK. Second, I’d make him shave. Sorry. And stop …

(See? We told you he was a funny guy. Now hear the rest from the man himself.)

Has Jeph inspired you to do something about cruelty to animals? We hope so. Why not start by leaving animals off your plate? It’s easier than you think. So take Jeph’s advice and just try it. What have you got to lose? As Jeph says, “Try it—is it gonna kill ya? No. Just try it.”