How Adopting an Animal Is Like Having a Child
We all know that adopting a furry friend is literally the best thing in the world—ever. But let’s not kid ourselves: Caring for a companion animal is essentially the same thing as caring for a human child (except way more adorable and fun, because let’s be real: Fuzzy babies = the BEST babies). From waving goodbye to your social life to breaking the bank every time your little one needs a check-up or a new toy, these commitments are as real as they come.
1) You clean up their poop.
How can so much poop come out of something so small?!
2) You bathe, feed, and walk them.
Wet cat food = gross. Wet baby food = gross.
3) You are personally offended if other animals are mean to them, and it can create some SERIOUS tension between companion-animal guardians.
4) You’ll (rightfully) think that your companion animal is the best animal in the world who can literally achieve anything.
“Newman for President.”
5) They require CONSTANT attention, and you get offended when they don’t always reciprocate.
“WHY DON’T YOU WANT TO CUDDLE RIGHT MEOW?!”
6) Since they require constant attention, you can pretty much say goodbye to any spontaneity or long trips.
Your friends are going to the mall after work? Oh, that’s funny, because you’re going home to make sure your companion animal hasn’t burned your house to the ground, pooped everywhere, etc.
7) Their presence on social media will very quickly become way more fierce than yours ever was.
“You can’t sit with us.”
8) You pay for their medical bills—and let me tell ya, that sh*t ain’t cheap!
Three hundred bucks to have your puppy’s teeth cleaned? DOES THAT COME WITH A MERCEDES?!
9) Companion animals are extremely hard work and a LONG-term commitment—but if you’re ready for it, it’s so worth it.
So, if y’all are like me, I’m sure you want to adopt every companion animal in the world. But it’s important to remember this: Just like human children, children of the furry variety require long-term love and care. If you’re not ready to make the financial and lifelong commitment to a furry friend of your own, do what I do: Help spread the word by telling everyone you know who’s looking to bring a companion animal into the family that they should always adopt and never buy!